Welcome back, Bachelorette Nation! After the marathon that was Rachel’s first night, it’s time to get to the business of forced cameos, group basketball dates and letting everyone know over and over that she’s here for the #rightreasons. Rachel has 23 guys left after night one which leaves us with the chaos of the first cocktail party for a second straight week. Chris Harrison, I hope you know what you’re doing! Let’s jump into this week 2’s recap!
Husband material challenge
As expected, our benevolent overlords at ABC set the tone by opening the episode with Chris Harrison letting the 23 remaining guys know that it’s important that they are here for the #rightreasons. After that and only 4 minutes in, we get our first “whaboom” from Lucas. It’s going to be a long night, ya’ll.
Rachel has some help on the first group date from her friends and “Hollywood Power Couple” Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis. They are hosting a “husband material” obstacle course which includes stations like baby changing and a baby bjorn. Full disclosure, I have 2 children and still don’t know how to use a baby bjorn – so this looks to be pretty challenging. The guys barrel through the course and to our collective dismay, Lucas wins. He celebrates by spiking the baby and yelling “Whaboom”. This f’in guy, AMIRITE?. He then tries to get Ashton Kutcher to yell “whaboom” which is met with Ashton blankly staring back at him. He does not oblige and at this moment, I am an Ashton Kutcher fan.
As an aside, I can’t think of what they could be plugging right now, so perhaps they are just legitimately Bachelor(ette) super fans? I’m going to go with that narrative!
Post challenge drama
After the challenge, the gang heads off for some quiet time. Most of the interactions are painfully awkward but the main event of this segment is Blake E calling out Lucas to Rachel. He literally tells her that Lucas is here for the #wrongreasons and is only on the show to be on TV. Ironically, Blake was on the same reality show as Lucas in 2016 (Ex Isle). Pot, meet kettle. Lucas thinks Blake is upset because he doesn’t have a brand like “whaboom”. I’m not one to advocate violence, but I really hope someone hits Lucas in the face with a pie or something. Ugh, he’s literally the worst.
The first not horrible interaction of the evening is with Dean. Rachel tells him that she wishes she got to be the one to make the “once you go black…” joke. Alternatively, I really wish they would let this storyline die. I’m really hoping the producers aren’t making her talk about it to soften the light racism in his opening joke and she thought it was genuinely funny, but it still irks me if we’re being honest. Make like Frozen and “let it go”, ABC. Kenny has a great chat with Rachel while Lucas and Blake are still going at it in the waiting area. Dean lands the group date rose. Dean is shaping up to have a lot of promise. Rachel and Nick’s relationship was laid back, full of goofing off and laughs. And so far, we’ve seen the most of that in Rachel’s interactions with Dean. Bryan trying to eat her face is one thing, but Dean seems like a better hang.
Rachel let the dogs out
Peter gets the first 1:1 date of the season and it wouldn’t be the Bachelorette without some manufactured drama. Rachel coyly tells Peter that she’s bringing a friend along on their date and if that was ok. He tells her it is (because he just met her a day and a half ago and still has to do whatever she wants) as a black Cadillac pulls up. The friend turns out to be Rachel’s dog, Copper. I don’t know if he is or not, but at this moment, Peter turns into the world’s biggest dog lover. Smart move, Pete.
Whether or not Peter likes dogs, he’s spending his date at “bark fest” in Palm Springs. They don’t really explain what that is and I’m pretty sure the point of Bark Fest isn’t to snuggle in a hammock (without your dog). Mid-snuggle, Rachel lets Peter know that she’d move anywhere for the #rightreasons. We get it, ABC – she’s here for the #rightreasons, but let’s talk in about 7 weeks when the subject of Fantasy Suites comes around and she’s giving hotel keys to 3 guys over the course of 3 days.
During Peter and Rachel’s dinner together, Rachel lets us know that she’s looking for Peter to tell her how he feels about her before he gets a rose. Kind of a lot to ask a few days in, but I guess we have to draw the line somewhere. Peter and Rachel discuss their teeth for a while (no, seriously) and then we dive into some light tragic personal stories, per usual. And just like that, Peter moves on to week 3 with a rose.
Hoop dreams and making a scene
Our 2nd group date of the episode is a basketball date featuring Rachel’s “friend’ Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. He lets the guys know that it’s not about skills, but about their character. Yeah, we’re totally screwed.
The game is pretty much just a bad pickup game with DeMario looking like the MVP. Speaking of DeMario, his “ex-girlfriend” shows up to chat with Rachel because apparently they never broke up. Uh, excuse me? She tells Rachel that she saw him on TV (on After the Final Rose) the prior week and wanted to confront him. DeMario and the ex fight for a while while Rachel tries to make sense of all this. Rachel then inspects the ex’s phone and sees that he very recently had a relationship going with this woman. In a scene that harkens back to Emily Maynard threatening to go “West Virginia backwoods on [someone’s] ass”, Rachel tells DeMario to “get the f@ck out”. This is Rachel’s #RightReasons moment of the season.
We head over to the after party which Rachel describes as “somber”. ABC loops some quiet piano music while the guys take turns telling Rachel how bothered they were by DeMario’s poor decisions. Josiah tells Rachel that, “It hurt me to see the hurt on your face”. He uses this as his in for some sensual smooches. Will? reads her a poem about success (seriously?). It was definitely one of those inspirational cards you can buy at whatever the classy mall version of Spencer’s Gifts is. Alex sings to her in Russian or something. After all that, Josiah ends up with the date rose for their deep conversation and his protective side. Let me be clear, I’m totally team Josiah – but you and I both know that he owes DeMario a beer for the assist on his date rose.
The return of DeMario
We open up on the show’s closing segment with security announcing that someone is at the gate. Pauly from “security” lets him know that he needs to check with Mr Harrison before he can let anyone in. Lol, come on. Chris Harrison tells Rachel that he’s here and, of course, she agrees to see him. The causes an enormous stir in the house among the guys – especially given how Josiah earned his rose. We’re hit with the “to be continued” at this point, so we’ll hate to wait until next week to see how this goes down. My guess – DeMario gets yelled at by the other 22 guys for a couple of minutes and after the first commercial break, we all agreed to never mention his name again.
Who goes home week 2
DeMario is the only guy to be asked to leave – so we’re still holding on to 22 guys to start week 3 (and I guess all 23 will be in the episode if we’re splitting hairs. Check back later in the week for a bonus post and our week 3 previews ahead of Monday’s episode!
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- Check out how you did last week with our Week 2 preview here.
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