Welcome back, Bachelor Nation! We’re down to the final 4 and you know what that means! We’re off to hometowns to meet each of the remaining bachelorette’s families. This week should be chalk full of concerned mothers, disappointed fathers and if we’re lucky, a few pseudo-violent siblings (still trying to live up to Des’ brother!). Let’s do this!
Kendall’s Hometown: Los Angeles, CA
We open up with Arie driving a car (because, did you know he used to be a racer driver?!) and when he sees Kendall they share a passionate embrace. From there, Kendall takes Arie into her “Taxidermy Room”.
Nope, Nope, Nope.
I’m super uncomfortable with all of this. I was looking for plastic wrap the whole time because “taxidermy room” is simply a fancy name for your Kill Room. I’ve seen Dexter and if this chick shows up with donuts, Arie needs to run.
They next stuff some rats and reenact their date in Paris (I’m serious). After this fun/horrific activity, they spend some time talking about who Arie is about to meet at her home. Continuing his Ben Higgins impersonation from last week, Arie lets her know that he’s falling for her. For those of you keeping score, we’re up to 3 women that he’s “falling for”.
Kendall’s family isn’t so sure
Arie and Kendall arrive at her family’s home and things immediately get real when Kendall’s twin, Kylie immediately sniffs out Arie’s bullshit. From her eyes, you can tell she’s not buying that Arie is falling for her sister after a couple of weeks and stuffing a few rodents.
Next Arie is off to chat with Kendall’s father and he’s even less enthusiastic than Kylie. Based on the ominous music in a minor key, it’s feeling like this date is going sideways. The date ends somewhat abruptly with Kendall letting Arie know how she feels. She tells Arie that “she can see herself falling for him” which sounds as sterile as a prepared statement from the White House council. We’ll see if this comes back to haunt her later.
Tia’s Hometown: Weiner, AR
This is the hometown date the producers were dreaming of. No, not because Tia is great and (hopefully) a Bachelorette front-runner but because of all of the weiner jokes.
Tia takes Arie to a racetrack to… oh, for crying out loud. YES, WE GET IT. ARIE USED TO RACE CARS.
We’re off to meet Tia’s family and after some initial pleasantries, they toast with, you guessed it, weiners. Arie and Tia’s (kind of intimidating) brother Jason head outside to chat for a bit. Jason confronts Arie about his nickname of “the Kissing Bandit” and in this moment, Arie may have pooped his pants.
Next is Arie’s discussion with Kenny, Tia’s dad. He asks if what he reads on the internet is true (that Arie is a playboy – seriously, is this still a contemporary term?) and Arie navigates his way into a blessing from Kenny. However it’s worth noting that he let Arie know that if he hurts Tia, he can find him on Google, and that would be bad for him. I would definitely take this threat seriously.
Becca’s Hometown: Minneapolis, MN
This date starts off as basic as can be with a trip to an apple orchard. They pick some apples and launch a few with a slingshot. From there, the tide quickly turns with some scary music and shots of Becca’s family bad-mouthing this whole process. Arie is in for a long night.
Dinner begins with Arie explaining the experience to Becca’s family and let’s just say it doesn’t quite land. Seeing the looks on her family’s faces during a hometown date, he’s got some work to do.
Uncle Gary pulls Arie aside and shoots him straight. Since Becca’s father passed, him and her uncles have been her “guard dogs” and clearly they take that very seriously. Becca’s mom first speaks with her and voices her concerns but then has a good discussion with Arie about what is important in a relationship. Arie asks for a blessing and her mom gives a pretty fair answer. She’s not sure about a marriage blessing but she will honor whatever Becca chooses.
Every season, there is one hometown that stands out as “real” – this is that hometown.
Lauren B’s Hometown: Virginia Beach, VA
Arie shows up to the beach and Lauren B executes her trademark basic girl jump-hug to greet him. I’m not convinced that these two actually have anything to talk about, so we’ll see how this goes.
We arrive at Lauren’s home and it’s clear that not only do she and Arie have nothing to talk about, but it’s a family affair. The amount of awkward silence is truly uncomfortable, Arie and Lauren’s dad go outside to talk and I was certain things were not going to go well. Her dad is a former military pilot and a total badass while Arie is “the kissing bandit”. In a stroke of total luck, Arie brings up that he was part of a USO tour in 2008 which completely breaks the ice between him and Lauren’s dad. Phew.
Arie and Lauren’s date ends and honestly I think I blacked out. These two are so damn boring together which means that she’s 100% going to win because Arie makes weird choices.
The Rose Ceremony
As the ceremony is about to begin, Arie lets us know that he’s fallen for all of them and has no idea who he’s going to pick. Way to go, dummy.
Arie pulls Kendall aside to ask her if she’s ready for marriage. Her non-commital “seeing herself fall for him” seems to now be biting her in the butt which sucks. She’s being normal and being penalized for it; and that’s saying something for the girl who made him stuff a rat on a date.
Arie starts handing out roses and it seems like it’s a formality given all that has gone down. Becca gets a rose, then Lauren B but, uh, looks like I was wrong. Arie gives Kendall the last rose and sends Tia home. I have no words – Arie officially makes zero sense now. At this point, he could send them all home and say he wants to pursue Krystal and it would not shock me. This is pretty annoying but Tia was always going to go home, she was never going to marry this buffoon. #TiaforBachelorette We’ll see you next week!
- See how we did with our Week 8 fantasy preview HERE
- Check out our “Right Reasons” t-shirt on Amazon HERE
- Be sure to join us for live BachChat and to follow along on Facebook and Twitter!
- Follow us on Instagram for all your Bachelor meme needs