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The Bachelor: Week 11 Recap – The Finale, Finally

The Bachelor: Week 11 Recap – The Finale, Finally

Welcome back, Bachelor Nation! Tonight’s the night that Nick finally gets to propose to someone he’s just met (for the 3rd time) because he’s “ready to fall in love” (for at least the 4th time on national TV). So yeah, I think it’s fair to say Nick Viall is actually the biggest threat to traditional marriage in our country. Buckle up everyone, it’s finale time!

The Bachelor: Week 10 Recap – The Fantasy Suite Part 2

The Bachelor: Week 10 Recap – The Fantasy Suite Part 2

Welcome back, Bachelor Nation! It’s time to mercifully end Nick’s fantasy suite dates after ABC decided that the way to create suspense this week was to just show us half an episode. Cool. I don’t know about the rest of you, but I found myself lost between the hours of 9-10pm on last Monday night. But just as Chris Harrison giveth, he also taketh away. This week, we will be subjected to an hour of Nick trying to be a gentleman…

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The Bachelor: Week 9 Recap – The Fantasy Suite Part 1

The Bachelor: Week 9 Recap – The Fantasy Suite Part 1

Welcome back, Bachelor Nation! It’s our namesake week, Fantasy Suite week. If you’re new to the franchise, this is the week where the entire premise of the episode is our Bachelor(ette) test driving the goods while doing their best to keep up the facade of being here for the “right reasons”. Since ABC can’t help themselves, the fantasy suite week is going to be split into 2 – 1 hour installments over 2 weeks. How fitting that a fantasy suite…

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The Bachelor: Week 8 Recap – Hometown Dates and Disappointed Parents

The Bachelor: Week 8 Recap – Hometown Dates and Disappointed Parents

Welcome back, Bachelor Nation! We’re 8 weeks in and our overlords at ABC have left us with yet another so-called “cliffhanger”. Given the state of their lazy social media which we covered in our Week 8 preview, we already knew we were getting a full slate of 4 hometown dates. 30 seconds into the episode, Nick slinks back into the hotel room to meet his tributes and produces 4 roses. The best part about this week is Nick doing his best to…

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The Bachelor: Week 7 Recap – Bimini or Bust

The Bachelor: Week 7 Recap – Bimini or Bust

Happy Valentine’s Day, Fantazie Suite Nation! We’re at week 7 of Nick V’s quest to find consensual co-habitation and it’s clear we’re at the part of the season when ABC needs to remind us, #BachelorNation, that our Bachelor is taking things super seriously. Either that or we’re deep into witnessing Nick’s long game with the remaining 6 women. I’m not saying that Nick is a bad guy, I’m just not ready to give him a TSA Global Entry card. We…

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The Bachelor: Episode 6 Recap – The St. Thomas Massacre

The Bachelor: Episode 6 Recap – The St. Thomas Massacre

Welcome back, Fantazie Suite Nation! We’re in week 6, so that means we’re about halfway through Nick’s journey to find an ex-wife and it’s time to separate the wheat from the chaff. Or at least get rid of some women that Nick is bored with. We pick up where last week left off with Taylor showing up to tell Nick the truth about Corinne. He indulges her and walks outside to hear her out. After listening to Taylor’s thoughts on…

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The Bachelor: Episode 5 Recap – New Orleans

The Bachelor: Episode 5 Recap – New Orleans

Welcome back, Fantazie Suite Nation! If you’re anything like me, the suspense of the Taylor / Corinne showdown has been eating at me all week. Just kidding, ABC’s attempt at manufacturing drama is super annoying and if we’re being honest, this week’s revelation of Corinne’s appearance in a Juicy J and 2 Chainz video was way more interesting. True to form, she appeared to be nodding off in the video – that girl really needs her 8 hours. Anyhow,after having…

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The Bachelor: Episode 4 Recap – Welcome to Wisconsin

The Bachelor: Episode 4 Recap – Welcome to Wisconsin

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 Schlemiel! Schlimazel! Hasenpfeffer Incorporated! Welcome to week 4, Bachelor Nation. Continuing a trend that has become tiresome this season, we open up mid-party. We dive right into the action with Vanessa having an adult conversation with Nick about his intentions and Nick assuring her that he’s, and I’m paraphrasing, here for the #rightreasons. Taylor and Sarah confront Corinne to which she responds “You do you.. you do you..imma do me… you go girl”. I…

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The Bachelor: Episode 3 Recap – Cheese Pasta and Bounce Houses

The Bachelor: Episode 3 Recap – Cheese Pasta and Bounce Houses

Welcome back, Bachelor Nation! After the least explosive bombshell in prime time network TV history (That Nick *gasp* hooked up with someone at a wedding) and its associated cliffhanger,we begin with Nick opening up to the women about his short, but lurid history with Liz. Nick is casual, whispering how he “wants to get to know” different women and they are eating it up. ABC essentially executes the “Men in Black” mind erase move and by the first commercial break, it’s…

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The Bachelor: Episode 2 Recap – Nick’s Nightmare Group Dates

The Bachelor: Episode 2 Recap – Nick’s Nightmare Group Dates

We are 30 seconds in and Corrine is “crushing so hard on Nick” and Rachel, the recipient of the first impression rose, is hoping to “continue to make good first impressions on Nick”. Uh, what? Chris Harrison also points out that since there are 22 women, it would be “physically impossible” for Nick to have dates with all of the women this week. No Chris, you are *literally* making that up. We’re clearly  in for a long 2 hours –…

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