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The Bachelorette Week 5 Recap Part 1: Norway

The Bachelorette Week 5 Recap Part 1: Norway

Welcome back, Bachelorette Nation! After being left with another (nauseatingly trite)”to be continued”, we’re back to pick up the action in South Carolina. It’s a “2-night event”, so let’s not waste time and dive right into our recap.

Bachelorette Fantasy League Week 3 Predictions – Mud and Rodeos

Bachelorette Fantasy League Week 3 Predictions – Mud and Rodeos

In case you’ve been attending an exclusive dogs-only party, ABC is hosting a weekly Bachelorette Fantasy League, where you can try to best your friends and neighbors each week by guessing what ridiculous phrases will come out of Whaboom’s mouth. The Fantazie Suite has a group you can join here, and every week we’ll be helping you make your choices. Welcome to Week 3, Bachelor Nation! Last week saw a home economics relay race, a Kareem Abdul-Jabbar 180, and an…

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WhaBoom: The Case Against Lucas -The Bachelorette Bonus

WhaBoom: The Case Against Lucas -The Bachelorette Bonus

I initially was going to include this in our Week 2 recap, but after thinking about it, it felt like something that deserved it’s own post. We have had contestants play the villain every season. Lucas’ brand of villain is different though. He’s all about his brand and essentially has nothing to talk about with Rachel aside from how much “whaboom” is inside him. Having him on the show hurts the (wait for it) integrity of the program. This doesn’t need to be high…

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Bachelorette Fantasy League Week 1 Predictions – Let’s do this!

Bachelorette Fantasy League Week 1 Predictions – Let’s do this!

Just like last season with Nick, ABC is hosting a weekly Fantasy League, where you can try to best your friends and neighbors each week by guessing whether or not Rachel is going to start the “passionate kissing” on night one. The Fantazie Suite has a group you can join here, and every week we’ll be helping you make your choices. Welcome back to the Fantazie Suite, Bachelor Nation! It seems like only yesterday we were trying to read the…

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The Bachelorette Bio Analysis; we’re both excited and terrified for Rachel

The Bachelorette Bio Analysis; we’re both excited and terrified for Rachel

Holy crap, the season is almost here!!! I have to admit, I’m a little upset at Chris Harrison that he made us wait until only five days out to see the Bachelor Bios. But I can forgive our benevolent, rose-bestowing overlord, as he’s given us a fine crop of Tickle Monsters, Denzel Washington admirers, and dudes with tattoos in strange places this season.  Let’s meet Rachel’s 31 suitors! Adam, 27, a real estate agent from Dallas, TX This preview of the first…

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The Bachelorette Season 13 Preview: Rachel Lindsay

The Bachelorette Season 13 Preview: Rachel Lindsay

Welcome back, #BacheloretteNation (and loyal members of #FantazieSuiteNation). It’s been a couple of weeks since we last saw Nick and Vanessa making poor choices together on primetime TV. Side note, if Ben and Lauren B can’t make it work – I’m pretty sure Nick Viall and Vanessa Grimaldi will be broken up by Labor Day. Side-Side Note, Vanessa made sure that her mug got on camera for every damn week Nick was on DWTS, so anybody who watched that hasn’t had…

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The Bachelor: Week 10 Recap – The Fantasy Suite Part 2

The Bachelor: Week 10 Recap – The Fantasy Suite Part 2

Welcome back, Bachelor Nation! It’s time to mercifully end Nick’s fantasy suite dates after ABC decided that the way to create suspense this week was to just show us half an episode. Cool. I don’t know about the rest of you, but I found myself lost between the hours of 9-10pm on last Monday night. But just as Chris Harrison giveth, he also taketh away. This week, we will be subjected to an hour of Nick trying to be a gentleman…

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The Bachelor: Week 9 Recap – The Fantasy Suite Part 1

The Bachelor: Week 9 Recap – The Fantasy Suite Part 1

Welcome back, Bachelor Nation! It’s our namesake week, Fantasy Suite week. If you’re new to the franchise, this is the week where the entire premise of the episode is our Bachelor(ette) test driving the goods while doing their best to keep up the facade of being here for the “right reasons”. Since ABC can’t help themselves, the fantasy suite week is going to be split into 2 – 1 hour installments over 2 weeks. How fitting that a fantasy suite…

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The Bachelor: Week 8 Recap – Hometown Dates and Disappointed Parents

The Bachelor: Week 8 Recap – Hometown Dates and Disappointed Parents

Welcome back, Bachelor Nation! We’re 8 weeks in and our overlords at ABC have left us with yet another so-called “cliffhanger”. Given the state of their lazy social media which we covered in our Week 8 preview, we already knew we were getting a full slate of 4 hometown dates. 30 seconds into the episode, Nick slinks back into the hotel room to meet his tributes and produces 4 roses. The best part about this week is Nick doing his best to…

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The Bachelor: Week 7 Recap – Bimini or Bust

The Bachelor: Week 7 Recap – Bimini or Bust

Happy Valentine’s Day, Fantazie Suite Nation! We’re at week 7 of Nick V’s quest to find consensual co-habitation and it’s clear we’re at the part of the season when ABC needs to remind us, #BachelorNation, that our Bachelor is taking things super seriously. Either that or we’re deep into witnessing Nick’s long game with the remaining 6 women. I’m not saying that Nick is a bad guy, I’m just not ready to give him a TSA Global Entry card. We…

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